'Hate' is a strong word, I hear you think. Well, I suppose your right. But, then again, five-hundred pounds is a lot to pay for a wardrobe only to find it destroyed. Why? Because you hid the Christmas presents in it.
Caesar is like a spoilt child at Christmas. He makes it his soul mission to locate the Christmas presents. Locate and destroy - that is his winter mission. Last year, luckily, he managed to break and enter into the room containing the Christmas presents a week too late, thus destroying the presents that I had received from other people and guzzling my boxes of Christmas choccies and despite upsetting me hugely, also saving me hundreds of pounds. Oddly enough, Caesar is not the first pet I have had that has attempted this. When I was 10, I had a gerbil that, after attempting to hibernate, came back to life whilst in the front room by the fire, escaped from it's cage and promptly gnawed it's way through the presents under the tree. Maybe it's just me and my bad luck with animals. Perhaps I induce some kind of Christmas mania on pets!
Did somebody mention Christmas?
Anyhow, I cannot describe the feeling when I walked through the front door to find my dining room security system had been breached and a very sick looking Caesar was sitting amongst piles of packaging. This is bad enough, but then you have to endure the people who tell you how you shouldn't have left it somewhere where he could get it. I kindly remind them that I didn't think he would be able to get it there...hence the reason I left it there. I will now proceed to move it to somewhere else I don't think he can get it and see if that works. Chances are that, eventually, it won't. Then, I'll be reminded of how this has happened before and I shouldn't have put it somewhere where he could get it. And so continues the circle of destruction. Caesar is like the housework; just when you think you've got on top of it, someone comes in with muddy boots on and everything is a mess again. Except for at least people don't say "I told you you shouldn't have cleaned that floor..." (I'm assuming this as it's not a problem I'm likely to come up against).
He might look like a perfect gentleman but wait until he gets near those presents!
For now, the Christmas presents remain safe. Behind a partly destroyed but as yet unopened wardrobe door.
Here is the 5 point Christmas present security plan:
1. Presents in a chest of drawers. Drawers are weighted so difficult to open and shut automatically if opened a short way.
2. Chest of drawers is inside a wardrobe which has two paneled doors.
3. Doors are tied shut by scarf/belt.
4. Wardrobes are in bedroom behind closed door.
5. Bedroom is upstairs. Stairs are guarded by a child gate.
As you can see, for Caesar to have caused damage to said wardrobe doors, which he has, he would have had to have already overcome points 4 and 5 of the security plan. This is true. However, as yet, points 1, 2 and 3 still remain strong enough to withstand his constant attempts to breech them....
Will it last until Christmas? Only time will tell...
There's still time to enter your rescue dog's details into Caesar's Rescue Advent Calendar. Follow the link to submit your dog, then look out for them appearing on the calendar in the lead up to Christmas!
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