Saturday, 28 September 2013

My red toilet roll holder...

Categorically, I would say that leaving and entering the house are the two hardest parts of dog ownership.  If you listen to top dog psychologists, then you should ignore your dog before leaving the house and after entering the house.  My question to said psychologists is 'how?' when a massive dog flings itself out of the house and onto the drive when you open a door it is near impossible to 'ignore'.  Particularly when it is screeching while doing so.  On the same subject, how do you ignore a dog that has just squeezed out of the front door behind you?
Oddly, Caesar is alright with me leaving for work in the morning.  Recently, he has even begun to sit by the door when I'm about to leave.  It's as if to see me off.  My favourite part is when he leans as far as his body will allow him to catch a final glimpse before the door closes but never comes out of his sit. 

Coming home is a different matter entirely.  I try not to look through the stained glass front door as often I can see the bumbling and bustling of a little red figure behind the door.  His tail seems to make his whole body wag with excitement.  Mentally, I add another two bruises to my already patchy legs.  
I need to sleep now - but I'll keep hold of you so that you don't go without me!'

When I come in from work, I put on my shadow.  It's a large red dog with an unusually spotty chest and it follows me EVERYWHERE.  And when I say everywhere, I'm not exaggerating.  The first thing I do when I come in is hang up my bag and head for the toilet.  I should know better than to leave work without going to the loo because once I broke down on the way home and then accidentally locked my keys in my car.  I was desperate for the toilet and vowed that I would never leave work thinking 'I'll go when I get home' again.  Unfortunately for my bladder, that was a few years ago now and apparently I haven't truly learnt my lesson because I still hop in the car at home time thinking 'I'll go when I get in.'  Of course, there is an advantage to going at work which I often forget and that is that I get to go to the toilet alone.  At home, this is an impossibility.  There have been times in my house where I have been in the toilet and the whole family has joined me - one partner and two dogs.  Although, as a rule there is usually just me and Caesar.  He will insist on standing next to me in the toilet so I use him to my advantage and balance the toilet roll on his head!  At least he has his uses!
My red spotty toilet roll holder!